Why I can’t find Home just yet

Recently I have had a significant longing for home. I have wanted to find my place. I’ve wanted richer and deeper community. I have wanted to experience life that is full and abundant and I’ve failed miserably.

This unmet longing has pushed me and has kept me thinking that there is something more. Something I’m missing.

I have been reading a book with several people lately. The premise of the book, in so many words, is about finding your heart and living from it. I’ve also started watching a show on TV called Once Upon A Time, at the prompting of a friend. The show’s premise is that there are all of these characters from story books who had a spell cast on them so that they no longer remember who they are. These characters go through life in a memoryless, hopeless existence. A young woman ends up in the town where these once fairytale characters live and she is told that it is her job to help people remember who they were meant to be, that they were meant for more than this.

As I’ve searched for home I’ve realized that this longing is really a longing for Kingdom. I want to live in the Kingdom of Heaven. I want to see love reign and people whole. I long for community that truly is self-sacrificing and that gives out of selflessness. I want the complete Shalom of Jesus to reign… and I will not find that this side of heaven in completion. I long for heaven. I long for Kingdom … my longing and discontentment with place has more to do with the fact that I am feeling alien. I feel like a stranger who doesn’t quite fit. I feel like a once storybook character misplaced, looking for the life that is more than what I’ve been living.


It is where the heart is. Literally. And my heart is in heaven, my heart is with Jesus. I desire to see His Kingdom come on earth and be a part of seeing Kingdom lived in such a way that glimpses of Kingdom, the aroma of Kingdom, the ideals of Kingdom are being seeing, felt and realized.

Home. I want to be home. I want to make this place like home. I want to work alongside others who also desire to live in a way that the Kingdom of God is made tangible to all those with whom we come in contact.

Take some time to think about what you long for? What is the deeper longing? Find someone to live and dream with and see His Kingdom Come and Will be done on earth! as it is in heaven.

2 thoughts on “Why I can’t find Home just yet

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